5 Steps on Dealing with Grief
Whenever we lose one of our nearest and dearest, it can come as a shock, regardless of the situation. Grief can take form in many ways, bringing on a whole range of emotions that we are not used to. Here are 5 steps to help combat your grief and to give you positivity in a hard period.
Funeral and Memorial
When your loved one has passed, the first step you need to take is the planning of a funeral. Depending on your religion and other circumstances, the funeral can take place very quickly after their death, giving you no time to consider what has happened and being able to express your feelings properly. Once the funeral has taken place, it can all be a bit of a blur and your emotions can understandably be all over the place. Many see the funeral as the final goodbye, however depending on how you are feeling, it may be worth researching into a memorial service for your loved one. A memorial service can take place at any time and can help you deal with accepting the death as well as giving you closure. Looking online can help give you ideas and information on how to plan a memorial service.
Take Some Time
Once the funeral and memorial have taken place, it can be hard to identify exactly how you are or should be feeling. It is completely normal to go through a wave of emotions, regardless of how much time has passed. Whilst some may want to get on with everyday life, others like to take a bit of time alone to deal with their grief. Depending on your situation, it may be ideal to take some time off work to help clear your mind and to get the rest you need. It is important to try and accept what has happened, otherwise, it may eat you up inside and cause you damage in the long run.
Speaking to Someone
Whether it be a friend, family member or therapist, having someone there to talk to can be detrimental to helping you in the grieving stages. Even if you are not up to talking, knowing that someone is there to support you can bring you comfort, regardless of whether you need it straight away. Opening up and being honest about your feelings can take a huge weight off your shoulders and can help clear your mind, enabling you to get back to your normal routine. Also, remember that it is good to talk about your feelings, and crying and showing emotion is not a sign of weakness. If you do not feel up to speaking to someone close to you, there are many trained specialists who can help you with no grief and give you tips and advice on what next steps to take.
Learning the Stages
They say there are five stages of grief. The first stage is denial and isolation which is a common emotion as it can be hard to accept that your loved one has now passed, and it feels easier to bury your head in the sand as opposed to having to face what has happened. You are then likely to feel anger and frustration, wondering why this happened to them and yourself. The third stage is bargaining, which means you analyse and evaluate the situation and begin to ask questions on whether anything could be prevented. Depression is the fourth stage and typically the lowest point we will feel. This is when we can not see a way out of the grieving process with sadness and regret taking over our heads. The last stage of grief is acceptance, where we can think more clearly and be able to accept what has happened and have the strength and ability to learn to live with the loss as opposed to getting over it completely.
Moving Forward
Once you have been through the stages of the grieving process, you will then begin to feel more positive and be able to return to your daily routine. Just because your loved one has gone, and you are in a better frame of mind, it does not mean you have forgotten about them. Being happy and positive is paramount to your overall mental and physical health, so do not feel guilty about being able to enjoy life again. To feel as though your loved one is close to you, many decide to keep an item of theirs which can help them in the grieving period and beyond.
If you require more information, ensure you look online where you will be able to access forums that specialize in grieving so that you are able to engage with those going through a similar experience to yours. Also, if you require immediate help, there are many helplines that are open 24 hours a day where you can speak to an operator who can help assist and give you the help you need.
This is a collaborative post.
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This is a great reminder. Dealing with grief is hard, but knowing the steps and making those around you more aware definitely help.
I have had to deal with grief alot within the past two years. It tends to be a difficult thing to handle
I just lost a grandmother and am grieving right now. It is so hard to deal with some of it.
We all grieve differently, and it is never easy. Sometimes we never truly “get over it” but that isn’t always bad. We learn to move on and remember, but will always carry them in a special place in our heart.
It’s all a process, but understanding the different stages can help. We’ve had a few losses in the past few months. It’s hard sometimes.
Sometimes I purposely think about good memories I made with my lost relatives. It makes me feel like they know I haven’t forgotten about them, which makes me feel less sad.