Gentle Sympathy Gifts for Hard Times (That Aren’t Flowers)

Watching someone you care about experience grief can be a life-altering experience. It can be challenging to figure out what gift to say or give to someone whose world has just been turned upside-down. After all, no gift you send could possibly match the tragedy of the situation or make things better. While that may be true, the purpose of sympathy gifts isn’t to change the past. Rather, it’s to let the person who’s grieving know they’re not alone and they have people supporting them through their pain.

When it comes to selecting sympathy gifts, you can’t really go wrong if your gift comes from your heart. Your loved one will appreciate the sentiment and knowing that they’re in your thoughts. However, you may be looking for alternatives to “typical” sympathy gifts like flowers. Here are five thoughtful sympathy gifts to help you show your love during hard times.

1. Comforting Meals

When someone’s experiencing loss, they often become emotionally, mentally, and physically fatigued. The thought of cooking meals for themselves or their family may seem completely overwhelming. You can help ease that burden by sending them convenient, ready-to-eat meals as sympathy gifts. Look for classic comfort food options such as soup, cookies, noodles, or bread. Naturally soothing selections like these will warm both their bellies and their hearts.

If you live near the person who’s suffering, you might also consider gifting them homemade meals. Putting aside your own time to feed another is like adding an extra serving of love to your gift. Freezer meals are also a great option for someone who may be inundated with meals for the first few weeks of their grief. They can put the meals in the freezer and save them for a time when they’re no longer receiving regular food from friends and neighbours.  

2. Personalised Gifts

Personalised memorial gifts can be extremely meaningful in hard times. Some people have an unspoken fear that they’ll forget a loved one they’ve lost. They worry that once their loved one is out of sight or reach for too long, the memory of them will fade. You may be able to minimise this fear by sending personalised memorial gifts. It doesn’t really matter what the gift is as long as it includes some feature that will help the recipient remember their lost loved one.

For example, a wind chime is a simple gift. However, it becomes an invaluable memorial gift when it has the name, birthdate, or favourite quote of the deceased engraved on it. Similarly, a simple photo book can become a sentimental family treasure when it contains pictures and priceless memories of a lost loved one. Other creative memorial gift choices include personalised paperweights, jewellery, and commissioned artwork.  

3. Living Plants or Trees

Flower bouquets are beautiful, fragrant, and comforting to look at. However, they don’t always make the best sympathy gifts because they die soon after they’re given. The death of a once-vibrant bouquet of flowers could subconsciously draw attention to the loss of a loved one. However, the gift of a living plant or tree can do just the opposite. It can remind grieving family members that their loved one’s spirit continues to live on.

Low-maintenance houseplants can make wonderful sympathy gifts for someone who doesn’t mind tending to them. Even a small tree can serve as a living reminder of a life well-lived. However, it’s important to make sure the gift recipient is OK with having something as permanent as a tree planted on their property. Alternatively, you could work with an organisation such as The Gifted Tree or the Arbor Day Foundation. They provide memorial tree planting programs with options for personalised certificates or sympathy cards.

4. Self-Care Kits

If you’ve ever dealt with a tragedy, you know firsthand how surprisingly difficult it becomes to care for yourself during hard times. This is especially true when you’re busy planning funeral arrangements or looking up your deceased loved one’s financial records and other pertinent documents. That’s why self-care kits make such wonderful sympathy gifts. They provide the recipient with easy access to basics like deodorant, lip balm, or soothing bath salts.

You might also consider including a gift certificate to a spa or massage therapist in your self-care gift basket. A relaxing massage may be just what your loved one needs to soothe tight muscles and ease their stress levels. A book on grief may also help them navigate the challenges of loss and teach them what to expect during the grieving process.

5. Thoughtful Words

Store-bought gifts provide a convenient way to show someone you love them and care about what they’re going through. But don’t forget how powerful words can be in terms of offering comfort and empathy. Sending a heartfelt card, writing a text, or talking to a grieving loved one in person often carries more meaning than any store-bought gift.

You may worry about saying the “wrong” thing when extending your written or verbal condolences. Rather than dismissing their pain or telling them their loved one is in a better place, try to listen and offer words of empathy. Phrases like “I can’t imagine how you feel,” “I’m so sorry for your loss,” or “How can I best support you right now?” are generally well-accepted.

Conclusion

Hard times come to everyone, but it’s easier to get through them when you have a rich support network on your side. Don’t underestimate the comfort you can bring to a grieving loved one by just being there. Providing thoughtful gifts such as those mentioned above is another great way to show love and empathy to someone who’s grieving. 

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